monday march 29th 2004.epitomises "monday blues".literally.woke up late for bis.so rushed down to school in a cab only to find out tt lesson was canceled.wasted $10.80.and from there it just went all downhill.contrary to what i posted this morning.i guess my hunch was spot on.controlled alot till i made it to psp2 class at 3pm.somehow.it just all came out.perhaps its with the knowledge that i had a bunch of friends to fall back on.simply broke down at egarage.so to cut it all down as much as possible.i was wasting my time.i was playing the fool.and for the 2nd time in a year.i'm either too late or just plain too fucked up for anyone.so i've been there for her for past what? almost 4 months? i guess at least now my questions are answered.feelings are "can cry" and "ignorance is bliss".but i'll pass on the ignorance bit.it just wouldnt be fair to her.but coming to fairness.when was life ever fair? having honestly loved that girl for who she is and for all that she's given me (not materially).i get my ass handed to me on a platter.and now what? i have no idea.she's the 2nd girl i've loved alot..and lost.but i guess its all part of growing up isnt it? love's never fair and i dont expect it to be fair to me anytime soon.so best wishes to her and jon.i'm just plain sorry and disappointed that for all the potential we had.we didnt give us a try.


Vertical Horizon - Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning)

So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring

Nothing's quite the same now
I just say your name now

[Chorus]
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I ever had

So you stole my world
Now I'm just a phony
Remembering the girl
Leaves me down and lonely

Send it in a letter
Make yourself feel better

[Chorus]
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't need me back
You're just the best I ever had

And it may take some time to
Patch me up inside
But I can't take it so I
Run away and hide
And I may find in time that
You were always right
You're always right

So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring

What was it you wanted
Could it be I'm haunted

[Chorus]
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
I don't want you back
You're just the best I ever had
The best I ever had
The best I ever