day 13 - solitude.
tuesday back from a working trip. another one's round the corner in about a week's time. what a rush. anyhows, the past couple of days was all about waking up at ungodly timings and being cooped up in a 4-star hotel that really feels more like a upmarket 3-star one. hah!
kaoshiung felt a lot like calcutta, india. really it did. the only difference was that perhaps kaoshiung was a fair bit more cleaner. of course it wouldn't be fair to say that the rest of it is similar. each city has it's charms and it's lesser-liked characteristics. all in all it was a fulfilling trip for me. went on a mental exploration. getting my thoughts in order. searching for answers that i never had (most of which i still don't). learning to survive on my own in a foreign land (literally) and well. just being independent in thought and in movement.
it's officially two weeks here in taiwan now since i touched down. i've never missed my family that much before. i've never felt so lonely in my life. to be caught in a place where i'm unfamiliar with the language and have very little friends to turn to for help. i'm on my own.
it's different when i was traveling around europe myself. the people there were more than willing to help and basically make life as easy as possible for a foreigner like me. here. just because i'm chinese i'm treated like "one of us", which in a way is good but it's pretty obvious that i'm not "one of them".
two weeks. i miss her like never before. and the randomness in me prompted me to miss anna as well. sentimental nostalgic me. and all that happened when i was at a river-side cafe with lawrence and james chilling out after a long day of doing nothing. hah. for all the texts and stuff. nothing beats being able to talk to the person over the phone, nothing beats being able to hear the voice. nothing beats being able to see the person. nothing. and that applies not only to her but to family too.
i was watching jackie chan's 'new police story' on cable the other night on tv and something struck me. his character and his girlfriend had the following conversation.
gf: what's the cure for someone if he/she misses someone a lot?
jc: to be able to see them
gf: what if he's unable to see them?
jc: -tears and then starts crying-
if you've watched the movie you'll know what happened in the first part of the show. if not, here's a quick summary. our hero (a senior inspector in the police) leads his men on a raid to arrest a gang of bank robbers who happen to enjoy killing police officers. things take a dramatic turn and he soon finds himself against the gang, with his men all hanging from the ceiling, dying. he then loses 3 different bets and then loses all his men. following that, he's an emotional wreck and in depression, drinking to drown his sorrows and basically on a low. he's unable to forgive himself for what happened and finds it hard to move on.
with that. i'm looking forward to june. if all goes well that is.
kaoshiung felt a lot like calcutta, india. really it did. the only difference was that perhaps kaoshiung was a fair bit more cleaner. of course it wouldn't be fair to say that the rest of it is similar. each city has it's charms and it's lesser-liked characteristics. all in all it was a fulfilling trip for me. went on a mental exploration. getting my thoughts in order. searching for answers that i never had (most of which i still don't). learning to survive on my own in a foreign land (literally) and well. just being independent in thought and in movement.
it's officially two weeks here in taiwan now since i touched down. i've never missed my family that much before. i've never felt so lonely in my life. to be caught in a place where i'm unfamiliar with the language and have very little friends to turn to for help. i'm on my own.
it's different when i was traveling around europe myself. the people there were more than willing to help and basically make life as easy as possible for a foreigner like me. here. just because i'm chinese i'm treated like "one of us", which in a way is good but it's pretty obvious that i'm not "one of them".
two weeks. i miss her like never before. and the randomness in me prompted me to miss anna as well. sentimental nostalgic me. and all that happened when i was at a river-side cafe with lawrence and james chilling out after a long day of doing nothing. hah. for all the texts and stuff. nothing beats being able to talk to the person over the phone, nothing beats being able to hear the voice. nothing beats being able to see the person. nothing. and that applies not only to her but to family too.
i was watching jackie chan's 'new police story' on cable the other night on tv and something struck me. his character and his girlfriend had the following conversation.
gf: what's the cure for someone if he/she misses someone a lot?
jc: to be able to see them
gf: what if he's unable to see them?
jc: -tears and then starts crying-
if you've watched the movie you'll know what happened in the first part of the show. if not, here's a quick summary. our hero (a senior inspector in the police) leads his men on a raid to arrest a gang of bank robbers who happen to enjoy killing police officers. things take a dramatic turn and he soon finds himself against the gang, with his men all hanging from the ceiling, dying. he then loses 3 different bets and then loses all his men. following that, he's an emotional wreck and in depression, drinking to drown his sorrows and basically on a low. he's unable to forgive himself for what happened and finds it hard to move on.
with that. i'm looking forward to june. if all goes well that is.
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