day 15 - appreciation.
thursday he walked into the office with very little sound. not many knew who he was. neither did i. i looked at him from my seat as he came towards me and headed for the office next to mine. his body shape, posture, his size. it said it all. he was sick. in fact, he had stomach cancer, the final stages too. he was my upper-upper-upper study.
xiao qiang. at least that's what they called him. his frail and small frame looked like one out of the pictures you see of the holocaust. a culmination of chemotherapy and his inability to digest much solid food contributed to him looking like he is now. and he's only 22.
yet for all the suffering that he's sure to be going through, he looked pretty lively and chatty. laughing and joking inside the other office with my bosses. but what struck me most was when he was relating to them how he found out about his cancer.
if i remember correctly, he went to the doctor's after experiencing what he thought was stomach flu. no one suspected a thing until the pain intensified and he was asked to take some precautionary tests. it was then that they found the cancerous cells but it was a little too late in the sense that it was already nearing the final stages. all the doctors could do was to slow down the process as best as medical technology allowed.
it gets you thinking about life from another perspective. i've never felt affected the way i did today. you always read in the papers about how terminally ill kids excel in their exams or do something that we normally wouldn't. you feel distanced, away from it. but it hits you when you actually meet them. it hit me hard today. i dared not look at him in the eye when i talked to him for that brief moment.
it makes you look at your life, think about what you have achieved in life thus far, your material assets and what-nots. it helps you appreciate life even more. and this post will be about thanksgiving.
family; always an infinite part of life. always there. always loving. always underrated when we're having the time of our lives. i've grown to appreciate them even more since enlistment and even more so now here in taiwan. i've never said 'i love you' to my mum, dad or sister and i'm ashamed to admit it. but love them i do.
friends; just yesterday i said thanks to (and for) a friend who has always been there for me. through all my ups and downs. a friend for 8 years. never once have i told her how much she means to me. not till last night. one of the best friends ever. as they say, friends come and go. and it's amazing how the past one year or so, i've gotten back in touch with many 'lost' friends. yeni. weiling. nicholas. brian. jolene. can't live with them at times but most definitely can't live without them. can't say how thankful i am for them and for my poly mates. shuren, ben, shaun, ivan and shank, delin, madelyne, wenru, tianci and others. all of them have stood by me through the past 3, coming 4 years. then of course there are childhood friends. julian, joanne and joanna. and i just realised, all of their names start with a j. haha!
i can go on and on about everything else but then this wouldn't be reader-friendly now would it? hah. then again. no one seems to read so who cares. heh. oh well. all in good time. we learn to live and appreciate everything we have lest it disappears before our very eyes.
xiao qiang. at least that's what they called him. his frail and small frame looked like one out of the pictures you see of the holocaust. a culmination of chemotherapy and his inability to digest much solid food contributed to him looking like he is now. and he's only 22.
yet for all the suffering that he's sure to be going through, he looked pretty lively and chatty. laughing and joking inside the other office with my bosses. but what struck me most was when he was relating to them how he found out about his cancer.
if i remember correctly, he went to the doctor's after experiencing what he thought was stomach flu. no one suspected a thing until the pain intensified and he was asked to take some precautionary tests. it was then that they found the cancerous cells but it was a little too late in the sense that it was already nearing the final stages. all the doctors could do was to slow down the process as best as medical technology allowed.
it gets you thinking about life from another perspective. i've never felt affected the way i did today. you always read in the papers about how terminally ill kids excel in their exams or do something that we normally wouldn't. you feel distanced, away from it. but it hits you when you actually meet them. it hit me hard today. i dared not look at him in the eye when i talked to him for that brief moment.
it makes you look at your life, think about what you have achieved in life thus far, your material assets and what-nots. it helps you appreciate life even more. and this post will be about thanksgiving.
family; always an infinite part of life. always there. always loving. always underrated when we're having the time of our lives. i've grown to appreciate them even more since enlistment and even more so now here in taiwan. i've never said 'i love you' to my mum, dad or sister and i'm ashamed to admit it. but love them i do.
friends; just yesterday i said thanks to (and for) a friend who has always been there for me. through all my ups and downs. a friend for 8 years. never once have i told her how much she means to me. not till last night. one of the best friends ever. as they say, friends come and go. and it's amazing how the past one year or so, i've gotten back in touch with many 'lost' friends. yeni. weiling. nicholas. brian. jolene. can't live with them at times but most definitely can't live without them. can't say how thankful i am for them and for my poly mates. shuren, ben, shaun, ivan and shank, delin, madelyne, wenru, tianci and others. all of them have stood by me through the past 3, coming 4 years. then of course there are childhood friends. julian, joanne and joanna. and i just realised, all of their names start with a j. haha!
i can go on and on about everything else but then this wouldn't be reader-friendly now would it? hah. then again. no one seems to read so who cares. heh. oh well. all in good time. we learn to live and appreciate everything we have lest it disappears before our very eyes.
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